I have MIA for too long! Haha..but who really cares? Must I still blog when its just me and my computer, my computer and me?


Feeling confused. Mixed feelings. I dislike making decisions in a haste. I hate to regret the decision which I had just made. I dun think I am regretting..just abit hesitant. Probably scared. Sorry for being so vague. I cant say much yet as I havent see the results myself. Abit superstitious here. Hee! I still want my freedom. Its abit selfish but, if I dun think for myself, WHO will think for me? When I keep quiet, it doesnt mean I want it. I just chose to accept and comply because its the easier way and I see no point in fighting. I am getting rebellious now. I can feel it in my bones. Haha!


Recently, I have looked at FRIENDSHIP from another angle. Seeing things from a different angle can give a different feeling and opinion. I still prefer the past feelings. For some, when things happen, it is harder to go back. And you just have to move on. Either to move forward without looking back or you move sideways and still bear the past in mind while moving on. For some, when things happen, somehow both of you manage to get back to square one again. I asked myself, whether I am a good friend to others. Whether I am qualified to be their friend, good friend, or best friend. Whenever my answer is a negative, I wish that I can be isolated so that I wont feel so bad about myself. In the past, I just asked ard and get real feedbacks. Being alone is not so frightening, at times. But it is not possible esp when you care. They matter. They are the people whom you can speak freely to (almost) and give you support when you fall. All along I thought I have strong and stable relationships with all my good frds. Until tests and obstacles came. Suddenly, it dawned on me that FRIENDSHIP, like any other kinds of relationship, is very fragile too. Saying FRDS FOREVER is so damn easy. Making it come true, is THE CHALLENGE. I learnt 3 important lessons til now. From 3 different groups of friendships. Not literally group la. I daresay one thing: you can never be too sure about anything in life. You can be 99.99% sure. Yet there is a 0.01% uncertainty. Maybe it sounds pessimistic. But it makes you not take every single thing/event/person for granted. Good in a way, yea?


My lecturer often say tis, 'Life is short. Dont make it any shorter.' Quite true. Imagine if suddenly, you are holding your last breath *choi choi choi* (imagine for awhile la), what would be on your mind? WHO will be on your mind? What will be your greatest regret? Hmmm for me..I wld regret ALOT abt not being able to realise my dream-be a successful accountant/auditor and also, set up my own family..see my sister settle down for the best..cant bear to leave all those close to me..and, finally meeting my mother and the rest. I will just smile and leave this world...

OMG! Haha..scary~! Thinking abt those possible regrets, motivate me to work hard for them. Am I pessimistic? Or is it just me?

Went to do ECG test today. Its for the heart. Happy that the results is normal..means nothing wrong with my heart. Haha..I worry too much! Oh well..I rather worry too much than find out sth wrong only at the last min.

My birthday coming! Something to look forward to. Haha..next frd's bday will be after mine. Lucky I have NO CLASS on my birthday. Woohoo~ Actually birthday is not that special. But its an excuse to feel happy, joyous, etc. And to meet up with ppl who cares about u.